When I was still in primary school, I saw a few times my mak gaduh2 dengan my ayah.The reason was always sama. Balik lambat. I used to think dulu why they always gaduh if he came back late.
" Awat mak marah ayah balik lambat? "
" Nanti hang kawin hang tau la " ...
My ayah drove this big lorry and he was always on the road, sending fish here and there. Lewat malam he was in still in Sg Petani, or A Setar hantar ikan.Dia dah jadi peraih besar masa tu..so upon reaching Kangar kadang2 he stopped and have drinks with his friends..Biasa la tu..
You know la my mak, she loved blabbering, and I suppose until now she is still very much the same.Only now dia berleter dekat anak cucu..
One night , very late , I heard mak pot pet pot pet..not a word from ayah.They were outside, atas beranda. My room was next to it.So I could hear every word.
Then I heard mak came in and come out again.
" Nah ambik tikaq bantal, tiduq di luaq.senang"
I waited for mak to come in then I went out to ayah.
"Ni awat tak tiduq lagi ni ? Pi tiduq." He said.
I looked at him. It must be cold out there. Kesian ayah.
"Ayah jum masuk ? di luaq banyak hantu ."
" Di dalam pun ada hantu !.Pi tiduq.Ayah tiduq sini "..
I hesitated..You know I was so closed to my ayah sejak kecik lagi.We shared many sweet moments..and most of all he used to be my die hard fan..when I sing..
I just sat there with him.When he fell asleep and I could hear him snore, I snuggled up close to him.
The next morning I found myself comfortably back in my bed.
" Ayah awat cek dok tempat tiduq cek balik ? sapa angkat cek sini ? "
"Takkan hang nak tiduq di luaq, sejuk.nanti demam "...
Now when I looked at his photo, one and only photo that I have , I always wish..although my wishes is sometimes tak logik and tak masuk akal..People say when you go to Mekah you can always pray for anything with all your heart and Allah will grant it.So I say to myself. "Dear Allah hopefully if I am able to be your guest this year to perform hajj in Mekah, I just want to meet somebody there who looks like my ayah..!! If God is willing nothing is impossible..kan? ? And I mohon panjangkan umur so that I have lots more years boleh doa for ayah..
I have always love u ayah..Rest in peace...