Wednesday, 28 March 2012

Looking beyond myself..


                           It is better to love and lost than not to have love at all.

                                         When you are alone and sad......

Lets share this beautiful poem.

In Life

In life there are people that will hurt us and cause us pain,
but we must learn to forgive and forget and not hold grudges.

In life there are mistakes we will make,
but we must learn from our wrongs and grow from them.

In life there are regrets we will have to live with,
but we must learn to leave the past behind and realize it is something we can't change.

In life there are people we will loose forever and can't have back,
but we must learn to let go & move on.

In life there are going to be obstacles that will cause interference,
but we must learn to overcome these challenges and grow stronger.

In life there are fears that will hold us back from what we want,
but we must learn to fight them with the courage from within.

Wise people say : I complained that I had no shoes, till I saw a man that had no feet....It is not the years in your life that counts.It's the life in your years..

            ..I am still looking beyond myself................(sigh  ...)


Tuesday, 27 March 2012

Cikgu Muhammad..

            " Maznah jadi cikgu saja ? Saya ingat dia jadi lebih daripada tu ..."
            Those were his words when he knew it from my mak that I was in MTC. This is the man (on the left ) Cikgu Muhammad my teacher when I was in primary school.

            He came to my house for my son's wedding reception here in Perlis.As fit as ever.Mungkin orang kecik tak makan tua  kut.

            People called him Cikgu Mad Jepun .Why? because dia paling garang dulu.Budak2 semua scared stiff when he came near.But not to me.He was the most friendly teacher to me. In fact boleh sembang2 and bergelak ketawa ..
            Long ago in the morning he would come to me and asked for the lyrics of songs yang hot masa tu.I was in standard 6 then..
           "Hoi Maznah, hang bagi senikata lagu M Salman tu kat saya .." Then came again.." Oi cmmana nak nyanyi chorus lagu ni ..."
           So I would then sang there and then that particular chorus of the song..
                    Wahai si dara jelita..
                    janganla berputus asa..
                    Meski pun apa akan terjadi..
                    Kasih tak kembali......

            His good friend cikgu Jaafar ( dah arwah ) could play the guitar well and always sang his heart out in the small staffroom we had then in the old school.
           When we have extra class and I couldnt go ( no transport) he took the trouble to pick me up at home.Dia ada motorbike yang I always jadi penumpang setia waktu petang pi class..
           Everytime I got first in the exam he gave me 50 sen.Then he would say." Oi hang contract nombor 1 saja tau.jangan bagi orang lain ambik,satu lagi saya nak habak , hang susah sat saja tau.jangan susah sampai tua pula.belajar rajin2 ."
          Year in and year out those words were like a magic wand , following me everywhere.But I couldnt fullfill his wish to see me step my feet in university. because I have 5 mouths to feed and those hungry stomachs couldnt wait that long..
           After year 6 , I lost him until suddenly recently  I saw him in town .He was crossing the road..
           He has not changed much.muka macam tu juga.I recognized him instantly and shouted like crazy.." Cikgu. cikgu Mad ! ! " Jejak kasih bermula..

           He started." sapa ni? "
           Kami sembang di tepi jalan tu like there was no tomorrow..and recently he came to my house for my son's kenduri. Maybe I was just an ordinary primary school teacher, but I have lived a good life.inspite of  those painful times Allah has been so kind  to me.
          Terima kasih cikgu..for understanding, for your support, for putting yourself in my shoes,for everything you have done for me when I was poor, helpless and miserable..


Monday, 26 March 2012

Kisah mengaji (Part 2 )..


       In my last post I told you about Kak Maimun our guru qur'an. Well I have another sweet memory about Kak Maimun and our mengaji gang that I would like to share with you readers .

       Mariyani has a brother Ki about the same age dengan my brother Mazni. So everyday all the four of us would go mengaji at Kak Maimun's house, a small wooden house but always kept very tidy and clean by Kak Maimun and her family.

       Before mengaji it was a routine to recite this doa penerang hati.Semua budak2 pun hafal doa ni..The boys liked to shout this doa and created a rhythm to make it interesting.

              One hot afternoon, everybody was so sleepy. Before we started the doa to begin our mengaji Ki said...
              "Oi, hangpa dengaq aku kata dulu.lepas tu hangpa ikut."
              So he said loud and clear..
              Allahhummaftah allaina hik, mata merah shooot...
          Semua tak tangkap lagi what he said, so he repeated..
          "Apa la hangpa, banyak tu pun tak boleh ingat.dengar ni aku kata sekali lagi.."

              Allahummaftah alaina hik, mata merah shoot...
              It sounded so funny.All the boys said together like choral speaking..and true enough, everyone tak jadi mengantuk.semua lively..and the girls gelak sampai berair mata.Lawak gila bila ingat muka Ki dok stressed the word ' hik 'and 'shoot' tu.

              Kak Maimun came out. Everyone quiet.
              "Sapa yang dok kata mata merah shoot tadi tu ? "
              Everyone terkejut.Ingat dia tak dengar.
              "Sapa yang kata mata merah tadi tu ? " she repeated.
              No one answered.
              "Oooh, tak mau mengaku na? , nanti sat".
              She got up and when she returned there was a cane in her hand.

              "Bangkit semua ! ! "
              Everyone stood up.
              "Sua tangan ! "

              Then semua kena..Piap..piap..the rotan hit our small soft palms..
               Mariyani opened her mouth and said.
               " Kak Maimun, kami budak pompuan tak kata pun "
               "Ya kami tak kata pun ,budak laki kata " I said.
               "Tak kira. Tadi bukan main suka hangpa gelak.Buat main doa na.Sua tangan, semua kena"
              Pedihnya kena rotan.Semua mengaji dengan tertib lepas tu.Sambil mata masing2 dok jeling Ki yang tunduk sampai kelantai...
              Many2 years dah berlalu, but this cerita doa penerang hati masih melekat fresh in my memory.
Bila ingat balik mesti tersenyum..disekolah bila ustaz ajar mengaji and budak2 baca doa penerang hati ni, kenangan tu masih singgah di hati, terbayang muka Ki dok rhyme the doa in his own way..dengan yang lain2 gelak keras perut..



Sunday, 25 March 2012

Kisah mengaji.(Part 1)


                                     Lebih kurang macam ni la suasana saya mengaji dulu
      Masa kecik2 pergi mengaji quran was an activity I looked forward to.As a kid, my friends and I  cheerful moments masa beramai2 pergi mengaji. My brother Mazni, Mariyani, and her brother Ki,were among them.
      My first guru quran was my ayah himself. Ayah pandai mengaji.When he got so busy My brother and I mengaji dengan our neighbour sekampung.Kak Maimun.She lives about 150 meters from my house in Telok Kachang.I finished my quran in the middle of year 3.But continued mengaji sampai year 5.
        I have two most memorable memories about Kak Maimun.One day when all of us gathered in front of her house for mengaji, her mak came out and said " Hari ni tak dak mengaji. kak Maimun dok sakit nak bersalin ..."
        Those days mothers bersalin di umah saja.Jarang ke hospital. We lingered around the compound.Teringin nak share the thrill of it.Kak Maimun nak dapat second baby.

        Kak Maimun's mak appeared again " balik la budak2 oi, hari ni tak dak mengaji. Kak Maimun tengah sakit tu "
        Kami masih tak berganjak.Before Kak Maimun got her first baby she had kicked down sekeping dinding papan rumah dia 2 years ago.We wanted to see whether history was repeating itself.

        Then we heard the voice of our Kak Maimun shrieking in pain..
        "Adoi, awat sakit sangat ni..." Then tum, tum heard her kicking dinding papan rumah dia.
        "Sabar la Maimun oi, satgi runtuh pula papan dinding tu." Her mak said.

        Then we heard her calling for her husband.
        " Mana pi entah, biaq aku sorang dok sakit ni." Then tum tum satu tendangan kuat dengar lagi pada dinding papan rumah tu.Kak Maimun menendang lagi we thought.
        Then senyap. Suddenly we heard the sound of a baby crying.
         "Yeah, kak Maimun dah dapat baby !" we yelled happily.

         Kak Maimun had two girls then.One she called Yang  (Sayang ) and the younger one Tan ( Intan )....
        That evening when we passed by her house we saw her husband nailing back into place ,the plank of wood Kak Maimun kicked down that afternoon. ! ! History did repeat itself.he he


Saturday, 24 March 2012

Hajat tak sampai..


        I told you in my earlier post, how my son Khazimi loves singing.And just like me he used to sing at a very young age. At 9 years old dah mula wakil sekolah dalam choir, and nasyid. Then at 12 dah berani to sing at the stadium for merdeka day celeberation.
       I still remember when he was 11 years old there was this singing competition in Kangar.Because the school saw his talents he was send representing the school. I chose the song for him. He got tru all the RCE level.. First in every show.
      Then came the day he was to compete at the final. About 12 finalists were chosen to sing on the day.It was held at the compound of Jab Pelajaran Perlis.  I bought him sepasang baju baru, seluar, kasut.
      On the morning of the competition,dengan takdir Allah, he fell sick.Badan panas. By 11 am suara hilang ! !
       Sayang nak lepas peluang bawa juga dia pergi. When his turn came, he sang in a hoarsy voice.. He looked at me. I signaled him to step down .But he continued singing .Tried hard to perform.Tempo and pitching ok saja.Kesian dia.Dalam sore throat and batuk tu dia masih dapat tempat ke 5 !

             I still keep this photo.Maybe he has forgotten about this incident.
             "Abg , kalau baca blog mak tengok gambag ni..ingat lagi dak ?  Inspite of that flu, the hot weather, you still entertained us with your song.You were the youngest contestant on the day yet you were able to sing with a live band.. Look at those two boys nearest to the stage.They were concentrating , and enjoying your song.." ...
             You have won the competition in your own way. I am proud...


Friday, 23 March 2012

Kesian Pe'ah

          This goat was not the goat that shared the experience decades ago. Gambar hiasan saja..

          The story began when my father bawa balik a goat.Kecik lagi.When I asked him why, he smiled then said..
          " Well, kambing ni Maznah kena tolong bela.."
          "Awat cek pula kena jaga ? "
          "Sebab Maznah kakak sulung, bila besaq sikit,kambing ni kita buat knduri nanti adik nak masuk jawi (berkhatan )."

        Everyday I would tie the goat dekat places yang ada banyak daun2 segar.And I found out goats do not like grass that much, instead they love leaves especially those thorny pokok semalu.Bahasa saya di panggil duri keman.
       Every morning , hari tak sekolah I bawa keluar the goat around 10am.My dad said goats tak suka embun2 tu so bawa keluar lewat sikit.
       Everything went on nicely until one day when I heard my mak said ..
       "Kambing ni dia paling takut air , lintang pukang dia kalau kena air."

        When my mak masak nasi air basuhan beras tu dia simpan, then she added a little salt in it.
      "Nah, pi bagi kambing minum ni, mesti dia suka."

       That particular day I tak sabar tunggu mak masak nasi, nak ambik air beras bagi kambing minum.
I let the goat enjoy his drinks for a minute then I poured the whole basin of the water on the goat's body.Apa lagi it gave a strange sound and ran wildly. Tali pengikat terlepas .I panicked.Lari la sekuat hati hambat kambing tu, tapi lagi jauh dia lari.
       Catching by breath di tepi semak2 tu , I turned back and told my mak the truth what happened. So my siblings pun semua went searching for the goat.
       Suddenly Pak Daud my neighbour came dengan kambing mengekor di belakang.
      "Ni bukan kambing hangpa ka ? jenoh nak tangkap, tali pendek ! "
      My siblings all turned back looking at the budak perempuan muka bersalah yang tak tau nak cakap apa lagi..
      I took good care of the goat after that, I gave it a name. I called it Pe'ah.I spent some time dengan Pe'ah tiap petang balik dari fact boleh dok bersembang dengan binatang tu walaupun dia tak boleh jawab balik.
      When the day came to slaughter the poor thing, it was the worst day for me. I did not touch gulai Pe'ah yang melinang dalam kawah tu..Kesian dia.Sepatutnya I tuang lagi air beras atas dia on the day, so that Pe'ah lari for good and orang tak boleh sembelih dia...sob sob.. 



Thursday, 22 March 2012

Nak lari mana dunia bulat ...

    When I was small the most miserable time is makan time. I hate eating especially nasi. My mak would tell stories, or promised macam2 to make me eat. That's why I was so skinny when I was a small kid.
      One incident I will never forget was one day during the dry season.Orang Perlis panggil musim timuq.Masa ni the padi fields were all dry and cracked up.Sometimes the cracks were so big .
      My mak called me " Mai balik makan nasi " many2 times. I buat pekak ja.In those musim timuq the children would always lepak di petak2 sawah. what did we do there? batang padi yang tinggal tu boleh dibuat serunai.Sometimes ambik a mengkuang mat from home , put in on the ground , duduk and cicah garam belacan di tanah sawah yang kering kontang tu.
      My mum would get desperate bila I missed my lunch and almost likely missed my dinner too. So she would bring a plate of rice to the place I was sitting with my friends. Apa lagi I pun got up and started to run macam nampak hantu.Then my mak would yell her favourite words.." Nak lari mana dunia bulat .."

      I peduli apa, kept on running dalam petak sawah yang cracked.Malang tak berbau , my small feet, terpelecok masuk dalam rekahan tanah tu. Couldnt get up and couldnt even moved.So duduk la situ keriau macam orang hilang akal.
      " Sakit! sakit ! "
      Then my mak sampai.. " Lari lagi , awat tak lari? larilah. nampak nasi macam nampak keling gila "
Masa tu we were always being frightened with my grandma's story that there was this one insane Indian yang suka potong kepala budak2.I know it was all bullshit nak usik orang.
      My ayah had to be called to the scene.Budak degil tak mau makan nasi tu terpaksa di dokong kerumah.he he.At home baru nampak the veins on my feet dah jadi biru..I have sprained my ankle.
      My ayah advised me sama dokong tu..." Lain kali makanla sikit nasi tu, nanti sakit perut.kalau perut kembung masuk angin lagi teruk, susah nak menyawa (Hard to breathe).
      When my ayah said anything I would always follow .Maybe because the way he talked to me macam kawan2, not persisting and menjerit2 like my mak...
       "Ayah kalau ayah ada , tentu ayah suka sebab since that incident cek tak pernah missed makan nasi walau pun sikit  ! !"

                 To my children yang maybe never seen sawah kering kontang ni la rupanya.Notice those lubang2 yang cracked tu.....I missed those days..


Tuesday, 20 March 2012

Horror...! !


           Somewhere in 1995, the teachers in SKSP organised a trip to USM in Penang. The headmaster En Salim suggested to take the year six pupils there to sort of show them the life in a university. Lots of advice from the lecturers and undergraduates to expose the pupils to study real hard so they too would be able to step their feet there.
           Among the teachers who went there was Pn Mariah. A quiet lady teaching English Language in the level 1. (Year 1 to 3).
           We stayed at the hostel. That night the men teachers started to frighten the girls and the female teachers about some eerie experiences they heard about USM hostel. I have heard about those kind of stories lama dah from my sister Mazila who used to study there after her STP. But biasa la pompuan, berapa kali dengar pun masih takut macam first time dengar.

           That nite we group together tidur dekat2.Picked up budak2 to sleep tepi so that we could be in the centre.he he.That nite it was safe and sound.Selamat..nasib baik 2 hari satu malam..

           The next day when we were already on the bus to come home, Pn Mariah excused herself to go to the toilet.So off she went. We seemed to wait for ages, she did not appear.So 2 girls were asked to go check on her.
           When we saw her coming, her face was white ...pale. She was not able to say a word. All the time she was gasping for breath.We let her take her time before she started telling her story.

          When she was in the toilet and about to come out, she heard footsteps running outside. A girl's voice shrieking, "Tolong, tolong, tolong ! !"
          Then a man's voice said " Jangan lari, jangan. aku bunuh hang , aku bunuh hang !  "

           Then the voice was so near.In fact it was in the toilet itself, in front of her door !. By then she was trembling .Takut tak tau nak cerita.
           The girl was heard to keep on crying for help. " Jangan bunuh saya , tolong jangan bunuh saya "
Then Mariah heard the sound like the man was stabbing a knife into the girl's chest.
            The girl was groaning in pain and the man was saying " Puas hati aku.Mampus hang ".

           Then everything was completely silent. Not a sound was heard anymore. Then she heard footsteps and the girls were calling, "teacher, teacher dok mana ? "

           Trying hard to get up she managed to open the door and stepped out. Relieved to see the pupils faces. She looked around the spacy toilet. There was no one. No one in sight. The floor was clean. No blood stains or anything to explain what she heard.

           "It was so real, I have never been so scared in my life." She said when she was able to have full control of herself.

           Some curious teachers asked the guard about it. The man said it was true.Many years ago an Indian girl was raped and killed around the place Mariah heard the noise.

           In the bus the men teachers were making fun of it.They asked the pupils to ask Pn Mariah, dia sempat dak basuh xxxxx sebelum keluar bilik air tadi....

           I was not able to laugh. I was still very scared myself then. Lucky I wasnt the one in the toilet .Or with my heart case history, I would have been dead dalam tu....mati ketakutan..Until now masih takut if I think about it..

 Pn Mariah and I after the incident. Tunggu dia calm down before we board the bus home.


Sunday, 18 March 2012

Khazimi's wedding

      11.3 di Kelang. Selesai sudah .pernikahan dan persandingan my son Ahmad Khazimi.The following photos are some of the many2 photos for u to see...first in Seri Andalas followed by in Indra Kayangan on the 17th.


                      Me: "Senyum2"
                      My inlaw.: "tak larat, awat pengantin pi bilik ayaq lama sangat.."
                     (Outside our hotel in Kelang)

                                        "Ha ha ni dia cincin kahwin .."

                               Tu dia.pengantin sampai dah di surau untuk di satukan..

                                Khazimi : " Awat ketaq entah "
                                En Salleh : " Sabaq2. saya pun dulu mcm ni jugak masa kawin dengan mak
                                                Raihan "

                         "Aku terima nikah Raihan Suhaila bt Salleh........."

                                                             Sarung cincin

                                          Ambik la gmbar nak hidup...

                                                         Doa selamat.
                                                         Suhail tengok apa entah ....

                                        Bersanding  di luar dulu sementara menanti pencak silat show..

                              Raihan "Adoi mak dia gigit jari saya ! "
                              (He really did...(I am not srprised he he )

                               Di atas pelamin .. Handsome jugak anak Pn Maznah ni kan ?

                                           Cutenya Sara..



                            Tudia bas besar dari sebelah pengantin perempuan dah sampai..

                                                      Pelamin raja sehari..

                             Bilik sedang menanti, siap fresh flowers di kiri kanan..

                                                        goodie bags..

                                           Famila and Kay..Teringat 4.7.dulu ke ? he he

                                            The glamour girls in the bilik pengantin..

                                                            Me and my sis

                           Menanti pengantin sampai, ambik gmbar dengan dua kawan2 yg dah lama pencen.

                                                            Mai dah..

                              Sara just got up from her afternoon a beautiful gown..

                                                    My two girls

                                  Pengapit control handsome...

                                                 Faten dengan baju baru..

                                           The father of the bridegroom happy habis...TQ Mr Fahmi.

                                                 My siblings..very helpful

                                                Mixed them well....bunga rampai
                                      Apa lah dalam kepala depa...?
                                  gantung la nak tambah meriah..

                                                            Potong kek la pulak

                                  The king and his queen berjalan keluar to meet the guests

                                  With the mother of the bride in bilik pengantin.

                                    Rakan sekampung Telok Kacang dulu..Tq sudi mai..

                                  Lautan dalam jangan di redah
                                  Ombak bergulung setiap masa
                                  Usaha berbulan tamat la sudah
                                  Pengantin senyum berbaloi rasa...

PS ...Legaaaaaa


Thursday, 15 March 2012

Macam tak percaya ....


        Last week I went to town to update my ASB book at the post office. I parked my car at the Store Supermarket. On the way down to the post-office, I stopped by to get myself my favourite magazines.
         Then saw Guardian was opened, bought my day cream and some facial cotton. Walked all the way (dekat saja pun ) to the post office. Ambik number and waited for my turn. So many people there.I suka tengok..macam2 gelagat.
         Suddenly I looked down and saw that I was wearing the wrong pair of shoes. Both black ,but different shoes.One with two straps across, one with many2 small straps.Both about 2 1/2 inches. Ya Rabbi, tak boleh nak gelak. Tak tau nak buat apa.Never happened before. My turn to go to the counter was coming soon.!
        Faten relax je. " Dont worry la. nobody noticed . Afterwards you just wear mine when you go out there at the counter." Then dia gelak keras perut.

        I looked around, everybody dengan hal masing2. Maybe because I was wearing black pants, kasut pun black orang tak perasan kut  (He he pujuk hati sendiri ).

       So we exchanged shoes. Very loose.Faten wears a bigger size.And I seldom wear sandals.Felt awkward  Adoi..Then my number was called.
       Before I got up Faten said " control2."
       Memang control pun , but because you were wearing shoes not your size mesti lah rasa strange  sikit kan kan ?

       Habis urusan, Faten asked , " Now where to ? "
       " Where to apa? balik la."
       "Tadi you said nak pi tengok blouse."
       "Tak mau apa dah.Takkan nak move around in this shoes ? Nak balik..!."
       "Jum balik tukaq kasut dulu, then we come back "

       That time it was already 11am. Time masuk dapoq. So went home straight.Tengok muka Faten masam di sebelah..Nak buat cammana.Mood dah hilang sebab kelalaian sendiri.

      Nak ambik hati the next day keluar lagi dengan Faten, this time .tengok habis2 sebelum menyarungkan kasut..kah kah..

     Moral of the you grow older your actions grow slower and memories grow thinner..

Monday, 12 March 2012


        I was in the staff room when I saw him passed by. He was quite short for his age. With very short hair, uneven teeth and a big mole on his right chin, he was quite popular in school.
       What made me wonder was why was he not at the field for his PE lesson...and that was not the first time  I saw him heading towards his classroom during PE.
       A teacher is always a teacher.Always caring and very concerned. I walked out and followed him to the classroom. I stood outside the classroom. Watched him from outside. To my surprise , he was doing something to the bag on the second row.And it was not his bag..
       " What are you doing ? " I said out loud.
       He let go of the bag.It fell on the floor. I guessed he must be very shocked to see me there looking at him.
      "Nak ambik pensel teacher "
      "Nak buat apa pensel? Now is your PE lesson, and you need a pencil? for what ? "

       Nama pun budak2. He couldnt answer. Just standing there looking at me with his face pale macam tengok hantu.
     " Look here.Kalau tak habak kat teacher nanti kamu kena.Baik habak, or I will take you to the HM "
     "Nak ambik sticker teacher .."
     "Sticker sapa? Kamu punya ke ? "
     Then I saw the stickers...memang pun pujaan budak-budak masa tu.
     " Kamu curi sticker orang lain.Ni bukan beg kamu kan? "
     He looked at me.macam cicak makan kapur. Terkebil-kebil...
     kesian la pula...
          Saya teringin tengok depa dok main.Tak dak duit nak beli..." He explained. I remembered my son Ahmad Khazimi who has lots of those stickers at home..

          What would you do if you are in my shoes? Give that small cute face a tight slap ? Or let him go?
          Well, I ordered him to go back to the field to continue his PE after he put back what he has taken. In the class later I confiscated the stickers from the owner of the bag and gave a warning not to take them to school..
( Only the  following week I gave him back..)
          But I did something that I shouldnt have done. The next day I brought some stickers belonging to my son and gave that poor boy. Can you imagine that..Told him to play at home and never bring them to school or I will confiscate them..

          I will never forget the look on that small face when I handed him the stickers. Muka syurga yang sungguh jujur..and that smile from ear to ear..

         Children ,the gifts of God to us. Take care of them. If we treat them right , they will in return  take good care of us when we get old..

Wednesday, 7 March 2012

The ugly duckling...

        Been searching for this photo .Suddenly found in the scanned photo collections.Anak sapa la ni.Hodoh sungguh, debab pula.ha ha.My children gelak sakan dulu2 when they saw this the first time..
        My mak said this photo was taken when I was 3 years old. Bulatnya mata.I remember my neighbor used to tease me when I was small. " mata besaq telur ayam" (kesian dia , she doesnt know big eyes are the in thing now he he.)
        When I study this photo carefully, I can see I was wearing a necklace with a locket. And my shoes sempoi kan? And pity sungguh, the cameraman asked the ugly duckling to pose in the bushes. Didnt he ever thought of snakes dalam semak2 tu..
        Behind me is the pokok rotan that I told you in my earlier post that gave us kids lots of buah rotan..kelat.
       I can still remember one Chinese man who went to my kampung often , galas a camera and called out." sapa mau amik gamak (gambar) ? saya sulah mai..

      His name was Inchan. (Spelling lama). so the kids would shout for their mak.
     "Inchan mai, Incan mai " semua eager to take photos.

        And so eager to take photo sampai tak kira di mana..Dalam hutan pun jadi..

                  Me with the one and only photo masa kanak2..dgn rambut separuh botak, peha berulas2. baju ropol2...and pandai tengok camera..sama dak dengan the lady on the right of this page ? he he

PS. kawan2 yang tengok post ni jangan gelak na...(there u are laughing now  ! ! )


Tuesday, 6 March 2012

Kak Nah part 2..a remarkable recovery...


       Yesterday I  wrote about this lady in my latest post. This morning the urge to see her  was overwhelming. It was quite sometime since I last visited her.
        So after the early morning chores, I was there at her house again. An elderly maid in her 60s,was at the door.A different maid this time. She told me Kak Nah was asleep and cannot be disturbed.Maid2 ni semua sama, depa malas nak layan orang, so bagi excuse orang tu lena.I insisted to just tengok dia saja.and told her I did not have the intention to stay long pun..
        She opened the bedroom door. There she was lying down fully awake ! .Bila I bagi salam and introduced myself, she wanted to get up.The maid had no choice but to help her get on the wheelchair dengan kasarnya.
        I heard the maid said loud and clear to Kak Nah " Ni nanti nak naik semula.Awas mama nanti kalau mau naik katil semula.susahkan orang"..(tak bersyukur sungguh, orang bayar gaji jaga orang sakit dia pula nak jadi mem besar ..) masa ni I dah rasa geram sikit2.tengok the way she pulled and pushed Kak Nah onto the chair..tahan tahan. sabar2..I told myself.
       Then when she was on the chair, I saw Kak Nah  pulling her sleeves down.
       "He apa lagi mahu ditarik bajunya, tidak ada gunanya cantik pun, bukan kemana ,atas kerusi saja ! " The maid commented lagi.
      I felt like I wanted to explode. I pushed the chair to the living room.And sat beside her. How age has changed her appearance.But one thing hasnt changed.Her smile with that twinkle in her eyes.
       This time she was able to talk though not really clear.and kept on saying.".Maznah? Maznah ? " pointing her finger almost touching my nose.
       And I kept repeating " Yes, Maznah, sama nama dengan kak Nah ".Its nice to see her smile again. Suddenly she was the one to start singing her Selendang Sutera. We sang and we cried. Finished one song she said ." English ? English " So I started "You are the answer to my lonely prayer...and she continued softly although the wordings did not make sense but it was better than the last meeting where she couldnt talk at all. I was very happy.
        I asked the maid to snap our photo.and before I left I did give some "lesson" to the Indonesian maid..I said to her..
       " Kak harus elok2 jaga dia.. Anak2 dia kerja jauh. Kak di amanahkan menjaga dia dengan dibayar gaji yang bagus. Tidak usah tengking2 dia. Dia kan lagi sakit.Sabar banyak2 dengan dia.Ini masa dia , masa kita belum tahu lagi." ( dalam hati still sore )

        When I got up to go home, Kak Nah siap lambai and said "Bye " She has improved a lot.She looked cheerful.And I tried to be as cheerful as she was.Saying out loud. "Ok Kak Nah, see you soon, bye ,take care "
        Her eyes followed my steps to the door. I know she was lonely inspite of the chatter box in her house.I hope the next time I come she'll be able to chat about good old time with me...InsyaAllah .

                                     Me and Kak Nah..( After the melodious session ) he he


Monday, 5 March 2012

Kak Maznah Abdullah..

        To a sweet old friend who shared many of my sad moments.

                                    Me in the red kebaya with Kak Nah , third from right.

           She was once the headmistress of a school in Kangar. She loves singing the most especially two remarkable songs ...her favourites were Canggung and Selendang Sutera.
              A lady cute and petite.Very sporting . Used to confide in her about many things before. She was with me when we sang with the PSKPP in  Kuantan  at Sek Men Alor Akar. In fact she was the one who helped me find an excuse there, when I had to go see a very important person in Sg Lembing then.
              We went singing to many places after that, but she was not always with me as her job as a headmistress kadang2 so busy, she couldnt make it. But I was not alone .I was always accompanied by the backup dancers.One of them was Puan Adeda , who was a teacher too living in Kangar ( became a good friend .)
           I remember Kak Nah's favourite words." Nah u tau dak lagu ni, bagi wording kat I ? "
           And when she saw me every time  she would say. " se nama mai dah" because we share the same name.
             Few years ago, I heard Kak Nah kena stroke. She was in London at her daughter's house then. After the stroke she was not herself anymore.When I visited her in Kangar,she was seated on the sofa .Her eyes fixed on the tv.Asked whether she recognize me, she paid no attention langsung.
            Her children hired two maids just to take care of her there. Her maid said " since you used to sing with her dulu, why dont you sing a song and see whether she can remember "
             So I sang her favourite Selendang Sutera with tears streaming down my face.

             " Selendang Sutera, tanda mata dari mu...telah ku terima sebulan yang lalu.."
             She stared hard at me, still no recognition in her eyes, But she nodded and said, "  ah ,ah"
Her maid told me, if someone tried to sing off tune or off pitched , she would shout, " No , No..! "

              I just sat there, looking at her, no point talking .She did not even turn to look at me.
             I tried to hug her before I left, she moved backwards and uttered " uh uh " refused to be touched. When I walked to the door , I  turned to look at her again. Her eyes glued on the television screen again, muttering something under her breath.
             I realized then she was not 'my' Kak Nah anymore..Because of her sickness she is like a stranger now to all her loved ones including me ,She whose shoulder I used to cry on..and I will never forget that sweet tender voice as she patted me who was crying and said " Dont cry,everything will be all right ....."


Saturday, 3 March 2012

When I was a little girl...buah2 ni la yg ada..

                        Yesterday I talked about buah salak, which is not a common sight here in Indera Kayangan. This time let me tell you what was commonly found here,  ages ago .when I was 9 or 10. Saya membesar dengan buah2 ni around me.Although many are seldom found nowadays, and my children maybe have never seen them at all.
                       Anak2, buah2 ni la yang mak makan dulu2.Not apples, grapes , oranges,pears,peaches ,plums or strawberries like what you all always buy at supermarkets tu..Kalau nak rasa imported fruits tunggu demam la.Then my mak will ask.

              " Tak mau makan nasi? nak makan buah apa? apple mau? anggur ka ? nanti ayah pi beli." ha ha tunggu demam baru merasa buah apple..!

                       Dulu2 di kampung,kadang2  pokok2 native ni orang tak tanam pun, they just grow wild .and the fruits jadi makanan budak2 balik dari mengaji quran.They didnt grow in anybody's backyard, so getting together makan buah2 ni jadi daily activities for us then. Ya la, takkan nak main masak2 saja everyday.TV pun tak dak kan...

          This is the first in the list.mostly every house grow this jambu batu.The boys like to take its branches to make  catapult.sebabnya kayunya tahan . When you go to the loo very often, my mak would take its young leaves and I have to chew it raw. Traditional remedy sometimes is proven effective..

                                Buah mertajam,yang ni ada di belakang my house.Rasa kelat2 manis, but you have to wait till the fruits turned dark red or almost black baru sweet.

              This is buah goncar, or we called buah goncaq. Masam gila-gila punya.Tapi budak2 hentam juga bila buah2 lain tak ada.

       Buah rotan pun makan ? Yes we did. Tunggu la sampai masak or deep orange .Manis jugak.Rupa kulit just like buah salak ada snake skin pattern..This one pun ada di belakang rumah dulu di Telok Kacang.

                Buah kedabuk. Ada di tepi sungai.Kadang2 kawan bagi.Kelat sikit and lemak.Makan dengan garam belacan.Selalu the boys will find these and we girls ambik garam , belacan , gula , kicap and chillies and lenyek je sampai mixed well..cecah dengan buah ni..

          Buah belinggai, masam2 manis,I dont quite like this..tapi kalau kawan2 lain makan sampai lupa dunia, kita pun cubit la sikit..

          Keriang dot we called this. Yang ni juicy, my mak selalu marah bila makan ni, nanti air purple dia ni kena baju susah hilang.Dulu2 buah ni kutip ja sama balik mengaji.Mariyani paling suka, makan sampai hitam mulut.

              This is buah keriang.I told u in my earlier post .Sedap yang masak hitam tu..sweet.Lepas makan bibir, gigi semua hitam..he he..Pokok ni was just beside my house.A tall tree so tunggu buah luruh saja la baru boleh makan.Dahan rapuh.Tak berani nak panjat...sebab dah dengar banyak case orang mati jatuh pokok those days.

            Yang ni we called here buah kerkup, manis2 kelat.I remember bila bdak2 berhimpun petik buah ni ada one man tu dia letak pacau pada ranting pokok.Walhal pokok ni bukan dia punya pun.Pacau ni macam dia gantung plastik bag , ada la macam shreds of kain sikit letak.So my mak said kalau sapa makan buah pokok tu, perut jadi buncit. We girls semua takut, tapi boys, you know what they did. depa buang plastic tu and petik buah tu selamba saja.Bila Pak Mat came to the scene, he shouted "HOI " semua lari termasuk yang tak bersalah (tengok saja tak makan pun).. ni..

           My children did not have this kind of wonderful experience..menantu2 di Wangsa Maju  and Kelang tu apatah lagi..My little Sara nanti besar baca blog ni  lagi lah heran tengok these native fruits..they will wonder macam mana I boleh makan buah2 ni semua, and I bet their faces will light up when they read this..he he..