Tuesday, 31 May 2011

TIT BITS you will enjoy

 Teacher:   Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask
him for $6, how much would your father still have?
Ted:          $10.
Teacher:   You don't know Maths.
Ted:         You don't know my father!


Mother:    David, come here.
David:      Yes, mum.
Mother:    You really disappoint me.. Your results
are getting worse.
David:       But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother:     I know that, but I'm going Hong Kong
tomorrow so I'm scolding you now.


Father:   Why did you fail your Mathematics Test?
Son:      On Monday, teacher said 3 + 5 = 8
Father:   So?
Son:      On Tuesday, she said 4 + 4 = 8.  On Wednesday,
             she said 6 + 2 = 8. If she can't make up her mind,
             how do I know the right answer?


Girl:    Do you love me?
Boy:   Yes Dear.
Girl:    Would you die for me?
Boy:    No, mine is undying love


Man:    How old is your father?
Boy:    1 year older then me
Man:    How can that be?
Boy:    He became a father only when I was born


Teacher:   Simon, your composition on 'My Dog' is
exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
Simon:      No, teacher. It's the same dog!


Father:    Your teacher says she finds it impossible
to teach you anything!
Son:        That's why I say she's no good!


Teacher:    Where were you born?
Student:     Singapore , Sir.
Teacher:    Which part?
Student:    All of me, Sir.


Teacher:   How come you do not comb your hair?
Ah Kow:   No comb, Sir.
Teacher:   Use your dad's then.
Ah Kow:   No hair, Sir.


A boy came home from school with his exam results.
'What did you get?' asked his father.
'My marks are under water,' said the boy.
'What do you mean 'under water'?'

'
  They are all below 'C' (sea) level!'


 

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